Common Cold! Bah!

Common Cold
Ogden Nash

Go hang yourself, you old M.D.!
You shall not sneer at me.
Pick up your hat and stethoscope,
Go wash your mouth with laundry soap;
I contemplate a joy exquisite
I'm not paying you for your visit.
I did not call you to be told
My malady is a common cold.

By pounding brow and swollen lip;
By fever's hot and scaly grip;
By those two red redundant eyes
That weep like woeful April skies;
By racking snuffle, snort, and sniff;
By handkerchief after handkerchief;
This cold you wave away as naught
Is the damnedest cold man ever caught!

Give ear, you scientific fossil!
Here is the genuine Cold Colossal;
The Cold of which researchers dream,
The Perfect Cold, the Cold Supreme.
This honored system humbly holds
The Super-cold to end all colds;
The Cold Crusading for Democracy;
The Führer of the Streptococcracy.

Bacilli swarm within my portals
Such as were ne'er conceived by mortals,
But bred by scientists wise and hoary
In some Olympic laboratory;
Bacteria as large as mice,
With feet of fire and heads of ice
Who never interrupt for slumber
Their stamping elephantine rumba.

A common cold, gadzooks, forsooth!
Ah, yes. And Lincoln was jostled by Booth;
Don Juan was a budding gallant,
And Shakespeare's plays show signs of talent;
The Arctic winter is fairly coolish,
And your diagnosis is fairly foolish.
Oh what a derision history holds
For the man who belittled the Cold of Colds!

Ah well, it doesn't make any difference that my doctor is a woman! They're all silly anyway! From Monday to Thursday this last week, how I have suffered! And how it helped to know Ogden Nash suffered it too! :)

Anyway, things have gotten better since then. Lots of hot drinks, some major allergy medication, and many prayers later I have emerged unscathed from the jaws of a monstrous cold. And there was so much to be done that I could hardly afford not to! So on Friday I went off and applied for my international driving license at the WIAA. And to add even more virtue to the mix, I did my accounts for the year. After which I was so pooped I crashed for 13 hours straight! Then on Saturday, I did the one thing guaranteed to fight off the last vestiges of the Cold that was. I went shopping! Got myself some very pretty stuff, and it cheered me so much. I finally felt able to talk about that horrid, horrid cold. So there you are!

Apart from the cold though, quite a few things have happened since the last post. I finished with work on Friday and was given a farewell that made me cry. I've been very happy with work these last almost-three years. And that's only because of the people. They've been there for me through thick and thin and I'm sure I'll never meet another gang quite like this. I feel very proud and lucky to be this privileged. So farewell cake was cut, some unbelievably gorgeous presents were received, and many sad goodbyes were said. Only temporary, mind you.

Also, I had my first couple of kelvans. Now, for those of you who do not know maharashtrian customs, this is a sort of bridal shower thingy given by sundry family and friends when the wedding date has been fixed. In the old days this was done so that everybody could help out with the dowry and get the bride all the stuff she needed. Now, it's more of a fun lets-eat-till-we're-stuffed event. Although, they do still give presents to the bride!! So anyway, the first one was held at home with major relatives and stuff. Had awesomely good bisi bele bhaat and puranpoli! Enjoyed the attention thoroughly :) The next one was at some friends' house on Wednesday where, unfortunately, I didn't eat much due to aforementioned Cold of Colds. did have some nice gulab jamuns though. :) And that was that.

Everything else is coming along swimmingly, as the Brits would say. (Sorry, just watched Gosford Park on T.V.!) Only, once in a while, I long for A.C. all day and suffer caffeine withdrawal. Then I miss work. :(